Thursday, January 8, 2009


I have found 2 quotes that express the "mid-life crisis" I have been experiencing lately:

"Though no one can go back and make a brand new start,
anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending." Carl Bard

This one kind of sums up why I started this blog in the first place,
and why I want to find the new & improved version of myself.
Didn't like the way my life was going, so it was time to change it.

Unfortunately, there are still a lot of things in my life that are a source of dissatisfaction,
and the process of turning them around is a bitch.

Also, I want Brandon to have a new ending. Who can resist this face . . . .

(The one on the right, not the Hokie Bird)

So wanting to make his life just a teeny bit better caused me to
promise to put him in one of these contraptions . . . .

. . . . and do this for more miles that I am comfortable with . . . .

By the way - this is Team Hoyt, the inspiration for my endeavor.
Brandon met them, too, and was inspired
to convince me to endure pain & agony to make him into a racer.

Here's where I explained all this monkey business.

"Life is like a new car. Every once in a while you've got to find an open road and see what it will do."

This quote is the one from Christmas Day on my 2008 "Life's Little Instruction Book" calendar,
so I really don't know who said it.

I came very close to doing this last year.
I applied for and was offered a teaching position in Texas that I would have really really liked.
I want to teach again so badly that sometimes I hate even the thought of going to work each day.

Don't misunderstand,
I love the place that I work
(you won't find one better),
but I don't always love what I do there.
What I do there is noble and honorable.
I love the people I work with,
I'm nuts about my kids,
but I am a teacher at heart, and I miss it dreadfully.

To explain why I am not a teacher anymore would take more effort than I want to expend just now.

The job in Texas was soooooo very tempting.
Just the kind of place I like - a small city with a big university.
Rolling hills, friendly people, staff who really wanted to hire me.
But it turned out that it wasn't the right . . . oh, I don't know . . . time?
There were family considerations & a sucky real estate market, among other things.
But I wanted to take it, oh so very much.

Just about every miserable, rotten thing that has ever happened to me
has happened here, in this area.

Every now & then I look.
The job is still open, and I wonder,
"What if?"
"Did I do the right thing?"
"What if I just told them I changed my mind, packed it all up & started over?"

The open road calls me,
beckoning like a seductive temptress,
stroking my terminal case of wanderlust.

My will power leaves a lot to be desired.

These open roads are from the long road trip BS & took 2 1/2 years ago.
1 month,
8,300 miles,
from one end of this great country to the other,
side-to-side & top-to-bottom.

I would do it again in a heartbeat.


Marilyn said...

Hon, don't let excuses weigh you down. If this is what you want and if you think you will be happy, then you must go for it.

Anonymous said...

Took awhile to find this, but love it, keep it up, I will support you on any effort you do, write on and I will read...Ciao, choclate cheese cake..Suz

Kathy said...

Thanks crumb cake.