REINVENTION REBELLION

Today, I am rebelling against Vogue, Jimmy Choos, and Cover Girl, and all other purveyors of making women feel like they aren't good enough without thin bodies, high heels & painted faces. But first, a little back story.

I have always been rebellious, though not always in a good way. If someone told me I had to do something, or I really should do something, and they didn't give me a good reason, or the reason was "That's how it has always been done", I was bound & determined not to do it. These usually had to with two things: gender roles and worrying about how something "looks" (the "What will people think?" type of comments). Trouble is, some of those things I really should have done, and sometimes there were consequences.

So, in the process of reinventing myself, it's not that I am suddenly rebelling, I've just reached the point in my life where, if someone doesn't like what I do or how I look, that's their problem, not mine. Mostly, anyway. The "reinvention" part is that, in doing this, I am fighting myself and a lifetime of cultural & familial brainwashing.

I'm talking about these:

http://www.beautyandmakeup.net/cosmetics

The unique combination of the four essential nucleotides that came together to form my DNA was somewhat unfortunate in one teeny weeny area. At least, in the grand scheme of things, it is teeny weeny, but it has caused me a lifetime of insecurities. I refer to certain aspects of my appearance, namely:

• Pale, freckly skin

• Spaces in my teeth.

• Bad eyesight.

• Frizzy/curly red hair.

• Eyebrows & eyelashes that are blonde, hence, invisible.

Ah, thank you. I can feel your "awwww" of sympathy way over here.

Some of these I have dealt with, but during those awkward years, especially when I wore horn-rimmed glasses & braces, I bore the brunt of a lot of not-so-goodnatured teasing. Seriously. Remember these pictures?

BUT...

Freckles aren't considered so bad anymore.
Braces & laser surgery took care of the teeth & eyesight.
Now my curly red hair seems to be the envy of a lot of female types, ALTHOUGH, as I get older & a lot more white creeps in, I have been called a blonde by more than one idiot. Damn.

The only thing that stumps me is the blonde eyebrows & eyelashes. If not for regular cosmetic shenanigans, it looks like I don't have any. Really, people look kind of odd without eyebrows, doncha think? So, I have been taught to think that I have to wear eye makeup to look normal. If I don't, I get comments like "Are you sick?" or "Gee, you look tired." Thanks a lot. To avoid making small children recoil in fear, I dye my eyebrows every other week or so. I lip gloss. I mascara & eye line. I do all those things culture told me I had to do to look acceptable. All to keep me from looking pale, sickly & wan.

Enter M&M. Bless his heart, since day 1, he has told me that I don't need makeup. That I am beautiful without it. That he prefers me without the "false advertising"*. Have I ever said I love this man? And the best part is, I'm starting to believe him.

So, the rebellion is that I no longer wear makeup every day. I even go to work sometimes without it, and, oddly enough, no one has run away screaming or passed out from the shock. I get really brave on occasion and leave it off when I go see my mother. I kind of look forward to hearing the sigh of sad resignation (part of the rebellion). And the deliciousness of being able to rub my eyes whenever I want is indescribable. I kind of like this rebellion, although I will continue to dye my eyebrows. I have my limits. Next, maybe I'll make my hair red again. What do you think?

Oh, and what caused me to think about all this. My good friend Russ, to raise money for cancer, participated in a drag pageant and was enlightened by the beauty regimens women put themselves through. He wrote a terrific article about it here. Go read it.

*false advertising - wearing cosmetics and looking lovely, but then taking them off and making people go "Aaack!"